Friday, May 16, 2008

Kool-Aid Niggaball commercial

...and the niggas actually chant "Kool-Aid" at the end! This here ain't all hate. Good to see Escalade getting some work outside of the AND 1 tour. I know that nigga's in there. Only him and Oliver Miller are the only niggas alive who could through an alley-oop at that size. I shouldn't be surprised that Kool-Aid would have the balls to take it here. I've watched their ad campaign descend slowly into the pit of blackberry molasses that is The Negro Channel's evening viewership. These niggas are unscrupulous. For the past 20 years everyone's been pretty conscious about a certain white powder that ravaged the black community. Unfortunately crack took all of the heat when it should have shared some of that spotlight. The 5lb. bag of Domino sugar negroes mix into a quart of water hasn't gotten its due. This Kool-Aid shit is almost single-handedly responsible for the BDP movement. No, I haven't finally lost my churros. Kool Aid didn't produce "The Bridge Is Over." "BDP" is our latest installment to the slanguistics glossary and stands for "Black Diabetes Pandemic." If you don't believe me, I've spent countless hours in the lab and I've come up with the molecular formula for this sweet scourge of our people. [(1 packet Kool-Aid + 1 5lb. bag sugar)/day] X [all your natural life] = BDP Look at the commercial again. Pay particular attention to that poor little carjacker-to-be with the free-flowing 'fro. Little niggas out here worship the Kool-Aid. I'm pleased with the fact that these youngsters universally ignore Al Sharpton, but we've gotta be a little more careful still who we designate as role models.

4 comments:

Ether said...

"I've watched their ad campaign descend slowly into the pit of blackberry molasses that is The Negro Channel's evening viewership."

Come to think about it, i've NEVER seen a kool-aid commercial with somebody who wasn't black in it.
LMAO at him settin the pick, then crossin ol boy up, all in some air jordans.WE HAVE GOTS TO DO BETTER.

King Beef said...

Cap'n Crunch and its cheaper bagged and boxed incarnations have to get some of that BDP blame also Ron. Excellent hate as always good sir.

Lowedwn said...

OHHHH SHIT. this post is funny and true on many levels, but what really kills it is, I saw this shit a while ago and when i saw it first thing i said to myself...WWMS...What Would MEXXXICO SAY

hilarious as always man

SideBar: Hey can we get a poll going on when Mariah's gonna out Nick Cannon's batti-boi ass?

DP said...

BDP - YOU AIN'T NEVA LIE!

I be thinking that the pharmaceutical industrial complex owns a large chunk of the companies that provide us with High Fructose Corn Syrup.

As bad as sugar is, and sugar is badder than muvv, HFCS solidifies in our bodies