Kool-Aid Niggaball commercial

...and the niggas actually chant "Kool-Aid" at the end! This here ain't all hate. Good to see Escalade getting some work outside of the AND 1 tour. I know that nigga's in there. Only him and Oliver Miller are the only niggas alive who could through an alley-oop at that size. I shouldn't be surprised that Kool-Aid would have the balls to take it here. I've watched their ad campaign descend slowly into the pit of blackberry molasses that is The Negro Channel's evening viewership. These niggas are unscrupulous. For the past 20 years everyone's been pretty conscious about a certain white powder that ravaged the black community. Unfortunately crack took all of the heat when it should have shared some of that spotlight. The 5lb. bag of Domino sugar negroes mix into a quart of water hasn't gotten its due. This Kool-Aid shit is almost single-handedly responsible for the BDP movement. No, I haven't finally lost my churros. Kool Aid didn't produce "The Bridge Is Over." "BDP" is our latest installment to the slanguistics glossary and stands for "Black Diabetes Pandemic." If you don't believe me, I've spent countless hours in the lab and I've come up with the molecular formula for this sweet scourge of our people. [(1 packet Kool-Aid + 1 5lb. bag sugar)/day] X [all your natural life] = BDP Look at the commercial again. Pay particular attention to that poor little carjacker-to-be with the free-flowing 'fro. Little niggas out here worship the Kool-Aid. I'm pleased with the fact that these youngsters universally ignore Al Sharpton, but we've gotta be a little more careful still who we designate as role models.

The Boondocks: "The 'S' Word"

Whattup, spearchuckers? The great humor of all comes in the paradox that older people who, like Robert Freeman prostrate before news cameras, describe the "n"-word in any variation as hurtful. Yet, no one uses the term more than an old black person. My grandma nana'nem from Virginia. She could easily trace her roots a couple of generations back to the plantation. She grew up in the 1930s as a sharecropper before the hooch train dropped her off in Harlem. She also leads our family in NPS (Niggas Per Sentence) average. She does so by a wide margin. I'm creeping towards it, but I'm like Jason Kidd to her Oscar Robertson in terms of the triple doubles. In other words, I didn't learn that shit from hoodrats in the street or children at school. I learned it from grandma nana. Remembering the way she used to call pop-pop (or anyone else) a "nigga" in her saucy, hostile southern drawl still lights up my life. No one could do it quite like she did. She was my nigga, mane. As far as hilarious particulars go, how funny was the teacher running down the hip-hop "nigga" discography? As he ran them off I felt like I was in a scavenger hunt. I was one "nigga" short of Bingo! I had "Real Nigga Quotes" in the "G" column. As Ruckus explained, the racial slurs are in dire need of a fresh rotation. Regardless of what you may think of the "n"-word, it doesn't incur the same ire it once did. "Porch monkey" will always be my all-time favorite. The shit is hilarious. If a white person ever called me that, I'd laugh my ass of before I broke his nose. A special shoutout to Cee-Lo Green as the classic charlatan. Fuck Al Sharpton. Fuck Jesse. Fuck Farrakhan. Fuck The Negro Channel. Fuck Ann Coulter, Queen of the Desert... even if she fucks with these crab cakes. Who the fuck did her fucking voice? And oh, yeah... fuck. That's the "f"-word, spearchuckers. Does anyone remember this scenario the episode derives from? The teacher had the signs and everything. It was hilarious. Any thoughts?